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Hospice of the East Bay’s Comfort for Kids program serves the emotional needs of children and teens who are experiencing the death of a loved one.  Children of our hospice patients receive free counseling from pediatric specialists in order to acquire coping skills necessary to endure the pain of losing a parent.  The counselors listen to the children express their feelings of confusion and anxiety about the future--something that parents often cannot do when they are dealing with their own sorrow over dying or losing a spouse.

Often, children hold feelings inside rather than burden their already overburdened parents.  They may, for example, be ashamed that they are angry with a dying parent for leaving them, or they may feel somehow responsible for the death of a parent, grandparent, or sibling.  With counseling, children find relief for their pent-up thoughts and are encouraged to find positive ways of communicating with their parents.  Getting counseling at the right time during the grieving process (which begins long before the death of the parent) can make a tremendous difference in a child’s ability to cope with loss—both now and when further losses are experienced during his or her lifetime.

Another component of Comfort for Kids support for children of hospice patients is Taylor’s Wish.  Many children who have a parent in hospice care live in homes where there is real financial hardship.  The parent who is ill is most likely unable to work, and the other parent may have had to quit a job in order to care for the spouse.  For children in those families, Taylor’s Wish provides what the parents cannot.  That may include gift cards for buying food or clothing.  It could also be an opportunity for the child to meet a favorite sports figure, attend a game, go to camp, or receive a birthday or holiday gift.

After the death of a parent (or another loved one), the Footsteps program of group grief counseling and support is available to any child in the community.  Footsteps groups, organized by age and facilitated by professionals who have, collectively, more than 30 years of experience, meet for six weeks to learn healthy ways to express their grief and to begin to heal.  They do that through a variety of expressive arts activities, stories, and open discussions.  At the same time that the children meet with their counselors, parents or guardians meet in another room, complete the same activities, and have the same discussions.  The shared experience of the Footsteps sessions facilitates honest communication and mutual support between children and parents/guardians.

Together, the different aspects of Comfort for Kids work to acknowledge and address the needs of children and teens, providing assistance and positive coping skills that they will have at their disposal for the rest of their lives.